“Can you please show me a sign, God?” I pleaded one evening.
I spent my thirty minute drive praying, listening, and looking for Him. The first fifteen minutes I sat in silence with my hands on the wheel and windows down. No music. Just the soundtrack of the world whizzing by. The next fifteen minutes I prayed for everyone and everything I could think of before reaching my destination.
My friend waved as I pulled into the sandy parking lot next to the water. We walked, talked, and watched the blue sky change into purple and pink hues as the sun inched toward the water. All eyes on the setting sun behind the deep blue sea. Not a cloud in sight.
We said our goodbyes and got in our cars.
“Can you please show me something now, God?” I asked again. I drove down the road in silence for a few minutes, then turned on some music and sang about my Father’s faithfulness.
I pulled onto my driveway, turned off the engine, and sat in silence for a few more minutes. I waited another minute just in case He wanted to show up before my bedtime routine- wash some dishes, wash my face, and wish for a good night’s sleep.
Silence.
“I wonder what it was like to see God as clouds and fire? I wonder what that ‘pillar of cloud’ looked like? I wish God would show me a cloud. A cloud sounds convenient,” I thought to myself. More thoughts of Israelites, Moses, and manna bounced around in my head as I rinsed breakfast plates.
I dried the last dish, poured a glass of water, and headed down the hallway to my bedroom. I passed by the first closed door where my kids lay fast asleep, all cuddled together in one bed- three peas in a pod.
Then I came to the next door- wide open. I stopped in my tracks. I couldn’t believe my eyes.
A cloud!
Yes, a cloud with colorful flashing lights that looked like a fire’s glow. A bright cloud illuminating the dark night. A cloud- a Christmas gift my daughter seldom uses. Did God get ahold of the remote? I pulled out my phone and snapped a photo- proof of a God who hears my every prayer and knows my every thought.
I watched the cloud’s colorful changing lights for several minutes as they switched from blue to green to orange and then red. I laughed quietly in amazement so I wouldn’t wake the three peas in a pod.
“Okay, God. I see you! Thank you for my cloud!” I chuckled to myself.
I felt so silly yet so loved by a God sees me and knows my every thought. A God who loves me in my doubts and meets me where I am. A God who goes before me and encourages me with clouds and comforts me with His great love.
God sent His son to die for us, sent His spirit to dwell within us, and still sends us clouds of encouragement when hearts are heavy and doubts creep in.
My photo is proof that when you ask God for a little cloud, He will show you His great love.
So go ahead, ask God for a cloud. And then send me the photo!
With Love,
Audra
Lead, Kindly Light, amid th'encircling gloom,
Lead Thou me on!
The night is dark, and I am far from home,
Lead Thou me on!
Keep Thou my feet; I do not ask to see
The distant scene; one step enough for me.
St. John Henry Newman (1801-1890)
The Pillar of Cloud (“Lead, Kindly Light”)
On Easter Sunday of 2018, I asked God for a undeniable sign, as proof that a particular section of scripture meant what it seemed to say. Fifteen seconds later, He sent three dramatic, undeniable signs in a row. The scripture I was asking about would make my life situation difficult and challenging, if true. I asked, in a humble James 1:5 way and God answered. It has changed my life dramatically and it showed me the truth of scripture. Before this, I found ways to explain away uncomfortable lines of scripture. God is good and will listen when we humbly talk to Him. There was a witnesses, to this event, who was an unbeliever. He often said, "makes you think." At the end of his life, on his death bed, he decided to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. God changed two lives that day, with those amazing signs.
It is more than enough that He sent His Son to die for us, no need to demand signs. There are a few explanations for the toy cloud light coming on, however usually in the Bible a sign has no other explanation.
We should pray for others in their infirmities and then hear their stories of how God showed up and healed them, or how He restored their lost loved one. That’s where His glory really shines, that’s when His true light shines through the clouds. It’s not about us or our feelings and experiences, it’s about Him.
Demanding to see a sign from God and thinking he’s answered by a turning on a toy cloud light does not match up with the nature, nor the magnitude to which our God is described in the Bible.
If we knew how much He loves us, from reading His Word, we would not need to demand Him to show Himself, this only moves us further away from Him.
Audra, He loves you so much, He left these words for you:
“And remember that I am always with you until the end of time.”
Mathew 28:20